I'm Not Saying "No" to Anything

Okay, the hair is pretty shocking, but it's just a side effect of my medication. I'm still totally cute, and TOTALLY a girl. I tell you what, to make up for... you know... I'm up for doing anything you want. Absolutely anything. I'll even come over at night when I know you're just wasted. Please, I'm so miserable. My sorority sisters call me "Cheetah" like Tarzan's monkey, and they're my friends. I'll bring Jager too.