Charges Best Left Unstated

When crime is carried out amidst the frivolty and fun of something like a cow costume, it is particularly disturbing. I don't want to know what this person did to end up in the hands of the law, as it would rock my world view and haunt my dreams. Unless of course it was just a Moooving Violation. Ugh, see,? Better left unstated.

They're Harder to Track Than You'd Think

Trust me, I've been hunting big game cow for decades and they're much tougher to take down than they appear. If you drive them to the slaughterhouse, they go really easy, following the herd and all. But, if you track down a wild cow on the open range then they're... okay fine they just stand there motionless. I just like beef so much, why would I hunt anything else?